Farewell Soho! Part 1

It's official! I am no longer a Soho Queen!

(Note: this turned into a very long post and I started writing it in early July. I decided to split it up for ease of reading. Part 2 coming very soon, on this page!)

Yesterday was my last day in my little Soho Palace, all my furniture and possessions left in a van last night. Today I spent a few hours cleaning and putting out the rubbish, and then locked the door for the last time!
I should perhaps explain why I've decided to write a blog post about this! I have lived in Soho for quite a substantial time, almost 8 years. After being a Stokey "Girl" for a while I moved in with my boyfriend in Soho in 2003, and we lived together for over 5 years. On top of that I have always worked in Soho, since coming to London in 2000, and have taken a keen interest in the local life, culture and gay scene, working closely with charity organisations based in Soho.

After almost 6 years my boyfriend and I broke up. For a while I thought that this was my natural cue to leave London, and I even did, for 2 months. I went abroad, the aim was to start a new life, but no matter how I looked at it I felt like I had left my heart and soul in London, in Soho! So I came back, I found a flat in Soho and got on with it!

This is when I "found myself" so to speak. I had friends, sure, but they were mostly part of my ex's group, and I felt the need to go out and make my own social circuit so to speak! So, I bought some supplies, made an outfit, and ventured to Trannyshack! Having heard and read about the club, and having done drag in the past (link) it was something I was keen on doing again and getting back into.
Going alone to a place like this can be daunting, and I was a little tense as I walked in, but the crowd were very welcoming and I had a blast! The first time there, and I met some very interesting people and formed some great connections, and I wanted more!

My sewing machine became busier than ever, knocking up little numbers as often as I had time to sit down! Next, I went to an event at G-A-Y at Astoria, and bumped into my old friend Cookie Monstar, who at the time didn't know I had gotten into doing drag! Cookie and I go way back, but she had spent some time away from London so we had lost touch. Now back together we started hanging out a lot, and as Cookie is a brilliant and very busy performer I started coming to most of her shows. She did a regular Sunday spot at Molly Moggs in Soho, hosted by the magnificent Dame Julie Paid, and after a while the three of us got together and created the West End Girls. For our first production we took on a mini version of Priscilla the musical, a 45minute extravaganza with more than 10 costume changes, complete with a 10foot glittery stiletto! We performed our show at various locations around Soho with great success.


Click image to watch video on YouTube!

By this time, I had moved into my new flat, literally on the doorstep of Trannyshack! I set up my sewing machine and got busy, making costumes for the shows. My little one bed soon became more reminiscent of the wardrobe department of a theatre, with dresses, boas, wigs, handbags and shoes!

(To be continued!)

Sex with the ex... ?

Now that I've got your attention... ;)

I wasn't really going to talk about sex with the ex, but having a relationship with your ex, as this is a subject that has come up a lot lately in my life. So, I wanted to share my views and get yours!

A little over 2 years ago, my boyfriend of 5 years and I broke up, and it turned my world around. We had shared everything for half a decade, good and bad times. Mainly good times. So for a few months we didn't really get on that well, sure, we'd still communicate, but on a practical level, arranging cat sitters and returning property etc.

Then, in the summer, I was around his house to collect something, and we had a little chat about how things were going, and he confided in me saying he had made a mess with someone he was seeing. So, good natured as I like to think I am, I talked him through it and gave him some advice. That was the point where we decided that even though we were no longer together, we could still be friends, and since then we have!

To make this even more complicated, throughout our relationship he was also great friends with his ex before me, who in turn is friends with his ex! Together, the four of us would go out for meals and drinks, or on holidays and weekend trips. The Ex-Men I used to call us, and still do!

Sure, there'd be arguments now and again, as there always will be with a group of opinionated people. But they were usually silly little things we'd get over in no time. Nothing really serious. My ex can be stubborn to a fault, and so can his ex.

But then, there was the fifth part of this story, my ex's current boyfriend. He was never too keen on the idea of doing things with us, and it has emerged that he didn't like that my ex was friends with his ex-es. This (among other issues) caused the end of their relationship (the one I gave advice on and helped work in the early days)...

Now I am seeing someone, who also has a great relationship with his ex. They exchange calls and texts, not on a daily basis but still, and his friends find it weird that he is in contact with his ex.

So I wanted to ask you guys, how do you feel about having a relationship with your ex?
If you are friends with your ex, are you comfortable with them, and even their new partners?
How do you feel about your current partner and their ex(s)?
Would you ditch your friendship with your ex if your partner asked you to?

PS. I understand that most people don't have the same relationship with all their ex-es...